August 7, 2010
Deadly Compliments
Posted by weightloss under Advice, Confidence, Exercise, Weight Loss HelpNo Comments
Deadly Compliments by Mary Ann Senatore
Hello all,
Its Mary Ann, your weight-loss partner. How are you doing?
How do feel when you lose weight? How do you feel when your clothes fit better? Have you noticed different interactions between yourself and coworkers now that you’re a smaller size? Are you aware of a member of the opposite sex checking you out?
Think about it, how does this make you feel? At first, it is a confidence builder isn’t it? At first it makes you feel good to be noticed and to have your accomplishments recognized. After a while, are those compliments leading to a demise or downfall?
We all want to be successful, and recognized success is always welcome. However, how we handle success is up to us and since we have come so far, we do not want compliments and recognition to be a brick wall.
Since we feel good to be noticed, does it get to the point where we become over confident? Do you attend a weekly meeting or weigh in and since you have been receiving compliments you feel as if you can miss a meeting? After all, you are getting noticed and you have everything under control, don’t you?
Well if we were in control would we need to lose weight? If we were in control, would you be reading this column? If we were in control would we have lost and gained the same 15 pounds over and over again?
Any situation in which we must demonstrate control has numerous dimensions. The statement, “Never let them see you sweat,” isn’t only for exercising. Remaining calm, not frazzled, confident and poised requires the ability to not let your head get clouded. So my question is, are compliments and success recognition when you lose weight clouding your ability to reach a goal?
You are feeling good, your confidence level is up a notch, and you just bought a smaller size. However you still have 30 pounds left to go. When you bought that new outfit, did you receive many compliments? Sure you did, but the ability to accept those compliments with a smile and a thank you and not let them go to your head is not easy. We like the compliments, we like that feeling of smaller, and we like recognition.
Do we tell our coworkers, spouse and friends not to say anything? If we tell them not to say anything do we wonder why they haven’t noticed? If we ask for an opinion and they give a positive one, are we setting ourselves up for victory or defeat?
These questions and many more have baffeled individuals while losing weight ever since the first pound became a problem for Adam and Eve. Is there a solution to receiving compliments and recognition and not letting the praise become deadly? I wish there was.
One way to look at compliments or recognition especially is with a little conceit. That’s right, conceit. Think to yourself, if you’re getting compliments and recognition and you are not at your ideal weight yet, imagine the compliments in the future will be like. You worked hard for this recognition, so let it be incentive to move forward.
When someone you haven’t seen for a while is just amazed at how much weight you have lost, let them be amazed. If they ask how you are doing it, tell them as much or as little as you want them to know. The more you tell them, the more questions you will be asked. Remember you are in control.
When you are out to dinner, make your menu choice be known first. We have all been out to dinner and have been told that we could splurge just this once. Or of course we look good, so what will a piece of cheesecake hurt? If we state our menu choice first, it shows assurance and confidence and it may even have a positive influencing affect on our dining companions to make a healthier choice.
No matter what, remember that we always have control of our destiny and the we are the success or failure of whatever weight loss method we choose. The program or plan does work, but it is up to us to make it work. Compliments and recognition will come, and handling them is another step along the weight loss journey.
Until next month, remember, you are never alone. I am always your weight loss friend.
Thank you,
Mary Ann